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Insecurity 1 October 2013

Posted by Dr Moose in Chaplaincy, Faith, Self-criticism, Theology, University.
Tags: , ,

I was tired last night, and after yesterday’s events, maybe that shouldn’t be so surprising.

Predictably too, my feelings then and now may be surprising: a noticeable difficulty in recognising and accepting that maybe I do make a difference by my presence and actions. The line we walk as ministers is so often one trodden cautiously, seeking to speak comfort, truth and peace without unnecessary upset (perhaps it shows how far we still have to travel to be like my Boss, Jesus, who was far from reluctant to tell it like it was, whatever the response!)  I love this chaplaincy role, it feels like the perfect posting. It’s a place where I can not just sympathise, but empathise, even if so often I feel my words are inadequate… or maybe worse, simply too normal. Making a cup of tea? Can that really be it? Well, maybe sometimes, yes…

It would appear that yesterday I probably got it as right as circumstances allowed, thank God. I can’t explain how I do things so very often, just like I find it hard to justify to others the satisfaction and joy that drive me as a University Chaplain. Perhaps the recurring question is rather more, when will I learn and accept that I do not need to justify my presence, when it appears that the results speak for themselves, and other colleagues and friends add their voices?



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